as aforementioned in the title, i haven't posted a weblog in fucking forever.

so here's the basics:

in november i got a tattoo on my hip of an "aum" which is a hindu symbol for peace and meditation. at the tattoo shop i met sean, who is now my good-looking, intelligent, charming, artsy, down-to-earth, talented, upbeat, irish-pride-filled tattoo-artist-apprentice boyfriend. i'm crazy about him and i'm pretty sure he's perfect for me. i am continually surprised at how well we connect and how deeply i've fallen for him so quickly. i feel silly in the best way and, really, to be honest, i'm totally in love with him. he's the best person i've known since i met my best friend who will always be my number one (open ass-kissing anyone? ).  

since our fated meeting i've spent countless hours hanging out at the tattoo shop, as i'm doing even now, in the company of some of the coolest people florida has to offer. go figure that most of them aren't even from this state. mike is the shop owner, he's from south philly and he's like everybody's surrogate father. mark is the other tattoo-artist and he's from boston, he's all kinds of tatted up and wears nothing but black and he seems weird and emo (for which i make fun of him constantly) but he's actually pretty badass, smart and fucking hilarious in his own impish, silent way. rosie is mark's girlfriend and she's also bostonian. she's covered in tattoos and she's totally cool and sweet and i adore her. there's a bunch of other random and varied hooligans that are in and out of here all the time but those are the important characters.

i finished up my externship at marriott and "resigned." basically it was mutually decided upon that i didn't "fit in with the core culinary team" which is a nice way of saying i hated working with all those fuckng douhebags and it showed in my work ethic. that was in mid-december.

i'm still searching for a job.

for a little while i found one at this little tapas resturant on 5th ave which is like the ritzy shopping district of naples. the manager, franko, said they wanted to start doing breakfast on Jan 1st and i developed the menu and everything and i was even helping them by bussing tables in between. then, the day after fuking christmas, this douchebag tells in unceremoniously that since business has ben so ood he didn't feel they needed to do breakfast for at least another few months and i'm like, "fucking thanks for the consideration, you couldn't have told me this a couple weeks ago, douchefuck?" but its whatever.

so since i ended my employment at marriott i had to move out of their empoyee housing. mark and rosie had an extra bedroom and bathroom in their apartment and they invited me to take it and split the rent. so sean moved right in with me and the four of us have been quite the happy family since then. i should say five since mark and rosie have an adorable cat named eleanor to whom i am less and less allergic.

anyway, other than being dirt poor, stressing about not having a job and pressuring sean to hurry up and get into actual paid tattooing (right now he's practicing but it doesn't generate any remotely significant level of funds), i'm looking up. at least i'm happy which for me is a huge blessing.

just the other day i could feel the depression starting to descend upon me again and i faced my fear of judgment at the hands of my beloved and opened up to sean about it. his reaction shocked me in the greatest way. he told me it was alright, he told me i wasn't crazy or a freak and that he'd love me through any mental instabilities whether fleeting or permanent. he assured me that he wouldn't abandon me no matter what, not even if i lost my mind. and he comforted me and the feeling passed. it didn't settle in and haunt me or torment me or weigh me down, it passed. i've never been so happy and relieved about my own mental state.

since this is turning into a novel i'll sign off and kudos to those who stuck it through to the end of this. i hope your eyeballs aren't bleeding.

steph had to see steve so katie drove her up here with their friend krystal and steph spent all night with steve and us girls hung out and had tons off fun talking and watching juno and doing things that are going to keep me from sleeping before i go in to do bake sale number two at marriott on my second day off this week. i was really looking forward to sleeping on my days off but i guess not. oh well, i can sleep when i'm dead.

haloween party this evening. i made jello shots and i have a ton of absolut and like two cases of beer so it should be fun come what may.

i'm going to continue to wig out in front of the tv now. due to my current state, typing is a slow and tedious task for me so i'm not diggin it.

peace.